Love Letters
by Scottwave
Summary: Ah, brotherly love in action...


"Love Letters"

Personnel Correspondence  
169982.3455  
Infantry Division: Unit Sunstreaker  
Access Code: Torr 4.3 Filan 6.0

I am telling you, Sideswipe, I'm not sure I have ever been anyplace as boring as Kalis. What a waste of space! Prowl keeps talking about keeping the remaining citizens safe, but I think the key word in that phrase is "remaining." Why wouldn't anybody want to leave this dump? We should be merciful and escort them to Iacon or something. Someplace with a little liveliness.

Let me give you an example of what I mean. Before I got here to add a little class to this first rate sludge factory, the masses looked up to that little glitch, Cliffjumper. The punk has gotten in my face more times in the past three lunars to last a slagging lifetime. And adding that class has come at a price. This "town" is simply _covered_ is grime. Cybertron below me, I swear that it's so thick in the air that it's like walking through a lube pool. It's everything that I can do keep my patina intact.

And to think, I turned down the Axion assignment. That place would feel like a metropolis compared to this.

Later, Sunstreaker.

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Personnel Correspondence  
170036.6527  
Infantry Division: Unit Sideswipe  
Access Code: Rast 7.9 Omicron 3.6

Nice to see you've got plenty of time to whine. We're actually, you know, fighting the Decepticons down here. You should have seen the size of the one we took down. I'm not sure what they energize the 'Cons with down here, but let's just say I stopped a couple of Autobots here from becoming one with Cybertron. You might even see it over the videoscope. Some journalist was down here to catch the action. Just look for me gracing your screen being the hero while you're sitting around polishing your axles and waiting for something to do besides complain.

As for your claim that _you_ turned down Axion and not the other way around? Well, let's just say that's not what I heard and leave it that.

Have fun living the good life up there and spreading-- What did you call it? Class? Yeah, uh-huh. Wuss.

Sideswipe.

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Personnel Correspondence  
170144.1667  
Infantry Division: Unit Sunstreaker  
Access Code: Torr 4.3 Filan 6.0

Hate to break it to you, bro, but I've seen more Decepticons here in one lunar than you'll see in a deca. I just didn't want to brag and see that inferiority complex of yours grow any more. Those goons try to infiltrate Kalis constantly. Please note, I said try. Because they always fail. And do you know why? Go ahead and say it with me: because of me. We have yet to allow a single 'Con into the city. By "we," I mean "me." I mean, come on, like the rest of this crew could really hold a beacon to me. Heck, they couldn't even hold a beacon to _you_, you slag-headed misfire.

By the way, saw that picture you were talking about. I beat a 'Con bigger than that before my recharge cycle. You're going to have to better than that.

Sunstreaker

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Personnel Correspondence  
170221.6648  
Infantry Division: Unit Sideswipe  
Access Code: Rast 7.9 Omicron 3.6

By the time you get this, you should have what is left of the entire Decepticon battle line that I single-handedly beat. Flew circles around those slaggers. You might have missed their remains though; all that was left was dust. And you really aren't the most observant one, are you? At least when it comes to anything besides _you_. There still might be some metal slivers around here if you really want a souvenir. 'Fraid that's it though.

And don't try to kid me. We've been to Kalis before. Even the Decepticons don't come around there. It's worthless. Kinda like you.

SS

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Personnel Correspondence  
170300.9527  
Infantry Division: Unit Sunstreaker  
Access Code: Torr 4.3 Filan 6.0

Worthless? WORTHLESS?! You really should keep that jealousy in check. Red and black is tacky enough without adding green to the color palette.

And for your information, they've been trying to establish a presence in Tyrest for the last 12 lunars. Again, trying. Again, they are stopped by me. Since those scragging vapor trash can't seem to learn to just crawl to the nearest smelting pool and scrap themselves, it falls to me to do it for them. Like I don't have better things to do. Damn grime...

In the mean time, you toodle around in with your jet pack pretending you're something you're not: talented.

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Personnel Correspondence  
170313.4424  
Infantry Division: Unit Sideswipe  
Access Code: Rast 7.9 Omicron 3.6

Get scrapped, you glitching cloud of drone exhaust!

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Personnel Correspondence  
170315.0025  
Infantry Division: Unit Sunstreaker  
Access Code: Torr 4.3 Filan 6.0

Nice comeback. And you can kiss my skidplate, smelting idiot.

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Personnel Correspondence  
170316.7253  
Infantry Division: Unit Sideswipe  
Access Code: Rast 7.9 Omicron 3.6

We still getting together in three lunars?

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Personnel Correspondence  
170317.2161  
Infantry Division: Unit Sunstreaker  
Access Code: Torr 4.3 Filan 6.0

Oh, definitely. Wouldn't miss it.

The End.


End file.
